Role Play Read online

  Role Play

  Alison Hendricks

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  Also by Alison Hendricks

  Role Play © Alison Hendricks 2020.

  Amazon Kindle Edition.

  All rights reserved. No part of this story may be used, reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission of the copyright holder, except in the case of brief quotations embodied within critical reviews and articles.

  This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely coincidental.

  The author has asserted his/her rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book.

  This book contains sexually explicit content which is suitable only for mature readers.

  Created with Vellum

  1

  Elliot

  If I was left to my own devices, I probably would have never gone out.

  But, my own guilt had ways of making me do things, overcoming my natural tendency toward introversion for the sake of my friends. After all, they wanted to spend time with me. They'd been asking ever since Barbara died, inviting me out to big events and small after-work things alike. I hadn't declined every one of those invitations, but I declined more often than not. Enough that my friends always joked they must have seen a ghost when I actually showed up to one of these places.

  It'd been different before. I was always an introvert, but Barbara had a way of getting me out of my shell. She told me to put those amateur acting skills of mine to good use every time we went out, and there were nights when I imagined myself as someone else. Sure, it was a little Burt Macklin, FBI of me, but it made for a fun time and got me out of my head. She'd always enjoyed it, too.

  She was gone now, though. She'd been gone for over a year, and every day, I noticed myself falling deeper and deeper into that hole of isolation. I knew she wouldn't want that. I didn't even want that. I missed my friends and, truth be told, I was lonely. Lonely enough that I'd made a couple of accounts across various dating apps to test the waters a bit. I'd jumped right out of those waters as soon as I dipped my toe in, but it was progress. Maybe.

  It was something I wanted to explore more, because the loneliness I felt when I came home to no one was beginning to weigh on me. I needed a partner, or at least someone I could spend time with. Someone who would help keep me sane when my students were being especially difficult. I wanted to be able to give another person affection again. To touch someone and have them touch me. To get off to more than my own hand for once. Simple wants, but still a big step.

  And honestly? I'd been thinking more and more about how I wanted that person to be a man.

  Maybe not long term. I wasn't ready for any long-term relationship just yet. But something casual, as a way to explore some things I'd never experienced before? It could have been an early mid-life crisis. Still, it felt like something I could handle. I was even excited by the prospect of doing it, even if I had absolutely no idea how to go about it.

  That was part of why I'd agreed to meet my friends at Dave and Buster’s after a couple hours' spent grading papers. Keith wasn't the only gay man I knew, but he was definitely the most prone to over-sharing. If I could needle information out of anyone, it would be him. Tina had always been supportive, ever since we ended up very close to the chopping block our second year of teaching. We'd suffered through the agonizing wait as the school got its grade for the previous year and the funding for next, and we'd both awaited the phone call as if it was the sword of Damocles over our heads. When we'd found out we would both have jobs the next year, we'd been completely blasted on bottomless margaritas at La Tienda. I'd definitely cried. Barb teased me about it later.

  They were good people, though, and more than just work friends to me. Sure, Keith came on a little strong. When he found out I was questioning my sexuality, he'd kept making me aware of the fact that he was down for a three-way if my wife ever was. She'd found it funny, but I'd been mortified each and every time. It was one thing for a spouse to be supportive of their partner redefining their sexuality as something other than straight. It was another thing to have to explain that your friend kept "offering his dick to the cause," as he put it.

  I was a little apprehensive about talking to him tonight, because I knew that would be where he went before anyplace else. For now, though, I just joined them in the booth, a glass of ice water already in my spot.

  "Hey, hope you haven't been here too long," I said, sliding in next to Tina.

  "Only about ten minutes for me. I have no idea how long Keith's been here. He was at the claw machine arguing with it when I walked in."

  "It moves weird," he said, after taking a sip of an overly frothy beer. "You stop the damn thing and then you have to wait while it swings. Time's practically up before you can drop it."

  "You know all these machines are rigged, right?" I asked. "They're eClaws."

  "They're what now?'

  "It's a brand of claw machine that's rigged to only pay out at certain times. On average, you have to feed it like ten to fifteen plays before it pays out with a prize."

  Tina snorted, lifting her own beer to her lips. Keith was just staring at me incredulously.

  "Elliot. I love you, but you are the dorkiest person I've ever met in my life. How do you even know that? How do you even know claw machines have different brands?"

  "Why wouldn't they?" I asked with a shrug. "Different manufacturers, and--you know what, never mind."

  Keith and Tina were both laughing, though Tina at least had the decency to giggle quietly and cover her mouth. Keith just let out these loud, gasping guffaws that showed off his teeth. I definitely wasn't going to tell them I liked watching people play crane games on YouTube. Nope. They didn't need any more ammunition. They had plenty listening to me gush about the kids I worked with at Horizon Youth Center and the latest adventure they'd been on in the Dungeons & Dragons campaign I was running for them.

  Not that I was ashamed of my interests. I was a high school English teacher, so by law I was required to either be a stern, smack-you-on-the-knuckles-with-a-ruler type, the type that referenced meme culture in an effort to relate to the kids, or just your standard, run-of-the-mill nerd. The last had always fit me best.

  "How much money did you waste on that thing anyway?" I asked.

  "Not much," he said, waving it off.

  "Not much" by Keith's standards probably meant way too much for a teacher's salary. Keith had always had champagne taste on a beer budget, though. Except when it came to actual alcohol. Then he was content to drink the worst beer imaginable, even if it was room temperature.

  I ordered one too, though, when the server came back. I at least had the decency to order one from a local line, though. I'd watc
hed First Magnitude brewery since its early days, having gone through the same teaching program as one of the founders. She and I hadn't even spoken since then, but I felt like I was somehow a part of it, cheering her and her husband on.

  I also ordered a burger, and we got some onion rings to split amongst the three of us. Mainly because Keith insisted. Dave and Buster’s food was just okay to me. A little too greasy for my tastes. But, it was pretty close to the school campus, so it was an easy place to meet up after work.

  We talked for a bit while waiting on our food to come. AP exams were coming up, and all three of us taught a couple AP classes. English for me, European History for Keith, and Biology for Tina. Keith also had the women's volleyball team to worry about, and regionals were coming up soon for them. I could tell by how much he was rambling that he was nervous about their chances.

  "Three of my girls are good enough to get a full ride as Gators. A couple more could play at Santa Fe. But, I swear to God, something happens every time they get together before a match. I've had to pick up girls from parties before because they were too drunk to get home and didn't want to call their parents. Somehow, they're less worried about me seeing them like that, the night before a match, than their own flesh and blood."

  He continued to rant, even continuing after the food arrived. Tina and I both knew for as much as Keith complained about it, he was grateful to be someone his girls trusted so much. He'd told us once about one of his players ending up in a dangerous situation with a boyfriend who didn't want to take no for an answer. He'd come just shy of assaulting a seventeen-year-old, but he'd wanted to focus on her and just getting her someplace she felt safe. He'd even fibbed a little to her parents to explain where she'd been.

  He was a good guy, even if he didn't always act on it. And I could admit, if things were different -- like our personalities being even remotely aligned, or me meeting him after Barb's death -- I might have carried a torch for him. I just couldn't see him as that, though. Even for a bit of casual fun.

  "How are things at Horizon going, Elliot?" Tina asked, gracefully changing the subject before Keith launched into another rant.

  "They're going great," I said with a grin, not bothering to hide the enthusiasm in my voice. "We're starting a new story arc on Friday. I've got some fun surprises planned that the kids are going to love."

  "Ah, shit. I forgot you had that going on still."

  I blinked at Keith. This was definitely one of the ways he was... not so great. I volunteered every Friday. Usually Saturday and Sunday, too. Sometimes during the week when it wasn't testing season. He knew that.

  "What did you do, Keith?" Tina asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

  "I maybe signed us up for this speed dating thing," he waved his hand dismissively. "Straight- and gay-friendly. I figured it'd be good for you to get some numbers."

  "Isn't your match on Saturday?" I asked incredulously, knowing full well he was going to take someone home after that and probably get very little sleep.

  He made a dismissive sound. "I'm a grown-ass man, it's fine."

  "Well, I can't do it. Sorry, grown-ass man. You'll have to get laid without me."

  "Or I could skip the speed dating and get laid with you," he said, lifting his brows suggestively.

  I rolled my eyes, dipping my fingers into my water glass and flicking some at him. "Ass."

  "Is that a request to see it, or just an observation that I have one?"

  "Oh my God," Tina mouthed, letting out a groan. "Could you try to be slightly less horny for once?"

  "Mm, no can do."

  "Actually," I interrupted, "that... kinda leads into something I wanted to talk about." I could already see Keith's puppy eyes turned toward me. "No, it doesn't involve you and me. I actually... don't think dating is a bad idea. I think I could be ready for that. I hope."

  Tina reached an arm around me, giving me a squeeze. "That's great news, hon. I'm super proud of you."

  "Yeah, man. I mean, I totally agree, obviously, but I'm glad you got there on your own, too," Keith reached across the table to clap me on the shoulder.

  "I've downloaded some apps, but I just... need to take the leap, I think." Reaching up, I rubbed at the back of my neck, the fine stubble of a recent haircut prickling against my fingers. "I actually think I might want to test the waters and date a guy."

  "Hook up with a guy," Keith corrected.

  I arched a brow at him, waiting for the explanation.

  "You want to hook up with a guy. You don't want to date a guy before you've fucked a few. Trust me."

  "Oh boy," Tina muttered, "here we go."

  "What, it's true! There's nothing worse than getting stuck with a guy who's terrible in bed."

  "I'm pretty sure there's worse," she said, continuing to glower at him.

  Normally I'd agree with Tina. And I did, in theory. I also had no idea what it was like to date or sleep with a guy. The way Keith tended to complain about his dating life, it seemed like there was a clear difference between dating a guy and dating a girl. Not that I had much experience with that, either. I met Barbara my freshman year of college and we were married as soon as we both graduated.

  The thought of actually dating someone was terrifying to me. But one night, no strings attached? I could probably do that. Who didn't have the occasional fantasy about fucking a stranger? There was something universally appealing about it because it was just taboo enough to be thrilling without being that big of a deal.

  "Let's say... I did want to just hook up with somebody," I said cautiously.

  Keith's eyes lit up immediately, and Tina whipped her head to the side to stare at me, eyes wide.

  "Seriously? You're agreeing with him?"

  "Of course he is. He's not ready to date, but I bet he's tired of just jacking it by himself."

  I felt heat pool in my cheeks. He wasn't wrong, but I didn't exactly want that advertised.

  "Hey, could you maybe be a little quieter when shouting my personal business to the world?" I hissed.

  "Tell me I'm wrong."

  I rolled my eyes but didn't dispute it. "You can pat yourself on the back later. I need some advice. I have no idea what to even... do."

  "Oh, that's easy. Just make shit up."

  I blinked at him, looking slowly to Tina. She just shrugged. "You opened yourself up to this. You're on your own now."

  "It's not like a dating site. There's not a guy alive who browses Grindr looking for 'interesting facts' about your interests or your political alignment or whatever. They want to fuck somebody exciting, and you're... well, sweetie, you're probably the most boring man I've ever met. No offense."

  "None taken," I said, though I casually flipped him off. "And it's not like I was sitting here thinking my experience as a dungeon master was going to get me laid."

  Keith opened his mouth, a wicked glint in his eyes. I cut him off before he could get the thought out.

  "Not that kind of dungeon master, anyway."

  "It could if you lean into it. Some guys out there would love to fuck the brains out of a nerdy twink."

  I didn't think I would have qualified as a twink even in my college days, but I decided not to say anything about it. Leaning into that part of myself wasn't something I was interested in when it came to a hookup. I didn't want to be fetishized as some glasses-wearing teacher who was insanely sheltered and didn't know the first thing about casual sex.

  Mainly because all of that was true.

  "It's all about playing a role, man. You have to commit to some version of yourself and just be that for a night."

  Playing a role. Since the early 90s, I'd been playing a role almost every week. Inhabiting the mind of someone else was one of my favorite things about tabletop gaming, and it was something I'd been eager to share with the kids at Horizon.

  Maybe I could do it. Maybe I could be someone else for a night. That way, if things went horribly, I could just... disassociate. No risk. No fuss.

  And still no idea w
hat I was doing.

  2

  Reuben

  "Two more reps. Come on, Ty, you got this."

  I stood behind one of the Gators' starting cornerbacks, my body set in a wide stance, center of gravity low as I spotted him during his bench presses. He struggled to get the massive stack of weights up to the bar, his arms shaking. I knew he was stubborn enough to keep going even if he was in danger of hurting himself, but I wouldn't have pushed him this far if I didn't think he was ready.

  As his arms continue to buckle and the barbell slips, though, I realize I was wrong. Quick reflexes land the bar in my hands, the powder I'd applied allowing me the chance to grip it with ease and put it back above him, the metal clanking loudly. Tyler Knowles, one of the best defensive secondaries I'd ever seen, and definitely one of the hardest workers, panted on the bench, his chest heaving. Sweat pours from him, completely saturating his short hair.

  "Fuck," he gasped out, his arm coming up to wipe away the sweat.

  Or to hide the hint of tears I'd seen in his eyes. I wasn't about to mention it, either way.

  "It's okay, Ty. You just need a little more time to recover. You've done a hell of a lot over the past four weeks, and--"

  "It's not enough," he said, his tone sounding hopeless.

  My heart cracked a little as I watched his shoulder shake, his arm still braced over his eyes.

  "Fuck!" he yelled the word this time, slamming his palm against the machine. "I'm so fucking worthless."

  "Hey." My tone was stern as I crouched near him, not continuing until he actually looked at me. His dark eyes glistened with moisture, tear tracks painting down his dark skin. My tone softened as I continued. "You're not worthless. You understand me? Even if you can't ever do a full routine again, that doesn't make you worthless. You got hurt, Ty. You damn near got your arm ripped out of its fucking socket. Give yourself a break."

  "Coach says I need to be back on the field for next week's game or I'm going to lose my spot," he said, his gaze casting up toward the ceiling. A few more tears slipped from his eyes.